Last week’s email was about believing that we are trapped, even though we may only be “Inches from Freedom.” If you missed it, read here first before continuing, because the visual metaphor was one of the most powerful ones I’ve ever been shown. Even today, I am astounded when I think of those unnecessary deaths, but even more so, how the lesson applies to us.
Today, let’s explore a few reasons why we would choose to stay under an illusion of being stuck so we can continue to live safe and small.
See if any of these hit
home with you.
Being stuck is comfortable. It’s known. It’s manageable. Risks are minimal. If we make some effort to get free and it fails, we can say we tried and therefore, relieve ourselves of any additional
responsibility to bring about change.
Blaming others for our predicaments is also a convenient cover, when we’re not willing to admit to ourselves that we are choosing stuckness to stay small.
Maybe some of us stay stuck because we don’t know what else we really want? That “not knowing” is enough to keep many of us frozen.
For anything to really change, we must go from knowing we don’t want to be stuck, to knowing what we actually want on the other side of freedom.
We have to be willing to spend time and energy asking ourselves what do we really want? (What do we really NOT want?) And at some point, we have to do enough research and experimentation to be able to describe what we want in detail, not just in a global way.
“I want to be a photographer” is global.
“I want to get paid well to
take publicity shots for up-and-coming bands” is specific.
The transition from global to specific is paramount in getting unstuck, in going from enough to abundant.
Global visions are a great first step. Narrowing a vision to include details and next steps around which plans and goals can be made is where many of us fall short. Staying stuck seems a better, easier option. I know this firsthand.
My own career “stuckness” is definitely related to lack of a detailed vision and plan. Knowing I love to paint and I love to write isn't enough. While doing the next right thing creatively is important, I need to have an end in
mind.
Without a long-term plan, day-to-day activities can feel pointless and kinda like being on a treadmill, at least for me. I can be creating and yet still feel aimless. I must ask myself, “What do I want?” And,
“Where do I want this to go?” No one else is going to ask this question for me, or for you.
I long to paint more, create more written projects, market my art online and explore licensing deals to see my artistic creations
on home products like wallpaper, shower curtains, pillows, area rugs and comforters.
I have always loved the art of business: doing business, creating opportunity and partnering with others for win-win deals. I love the
creativity involved with “making” money, and I'm using the phrases “making money” and “creating money” interchangeably. Money really can grow from trees if you know which tree you were meant to plant and nurture.
My
passion for business didn't die when my corporate career ended unexpectedly. Besides my other creative endeavors, pursuing business connections and “making money” is a part of me that wants to be nurtured, too. It may be the part that scares me the most?
My whole life, I have battled a fear of ”bigness,” afraid to allow my inspirations and ideas develop into projects that grow in scope and success. Fear of success is a real thing which goes hand in hand with “playing small.” The world does not benefit when we hide our light and withhold our gifts.
Now that my husband and I have moved, I could find endless tasks to keep myself busy organizing and beautifying our new home, inside and out. We talk of getting goats and chickens, too, which would require even more time and energy. I could easily stay busy for the rest of my life doing and caring for everything else, neglecting my dreams.
And these “distractions” would be honorable ways to hide from my destiny. But I know the truth—that I’m playing small and not facing my fears to become all that I am meant to be.
Hiding inside other noble pursuits is still hiding.
Have you heard of Tall Poppy Syndrome? The flowers that stand out above the rest are said to cause disruption to uniformity and are cut down. This analogy has been used as a metaphor for humans that stand out too, and sends a message that it's safer to stay
small and not draw attention to oneself (which is a false belief I have held since childhood).
But we don't hear about what happened to the poppies who were cut. We are meant to assume that was the end of them. But maybe
they graced the finest of tables in beautiful arrangements? Maybe they were converted into products, which made great contributions to the world and helped them live on in numerous other ways. Even if none of that happened, they enjoyed a better view from the field during their lives.
We can’t let comfort and safety keep us from greatness.
We were all made for our own, specific flavor of greatness. What is yours? What
contributions are you meant to make in a way that only you can? Do you know what those are? (If you want help, let’s work together! My coaching clients are finding these answers when we work through A Life Worth Having together.)
Are you willing to surpass a good life for a great one?
Do you let yourself dream big, and if so, what stage are your dreams: global or specific? Are you willing to become more specific and create a plan of action? What concrete step can you take today?
Think about
the picture I shared last week and those eight inches that meant life or death. For today, resolve not to succumb to the illusion of being trapped and limited, when the open doorway is so close.
I am inching forward. Will
you join me?
Oh Lord, help me dare to be great. Help those reading this dare to be all that they were created to be. Help us listen to the voice inside that's nagging, crying, and pleading to find a way out, or a way
through. That voice knows that freedom is close, perhaps just inches away.
