Another year has rolled around and some of us may be facing the exact same goals and issues that we faced last year, and perhaps even before that. Does this mean all this time has been wasted? I don't think so. Only you know that for sure but it can mean several things.
We may be more resistant to change than we realized. We may need to become more frustrated before we're really ready for things to be different. If that's true, it takes what it takes. If that means five years of saying we want something different, but not doing anything new, we're another year closer to being fed up so we can wholeheartedly embrace the change we desire. Getting sick and tired of a problem is a key component of becoming motivated to change it.
Other personal transformations just take longer to achieve, despite years of real effort, willingness to change and great intentions. We may be making progress internally but the external fruit is yet to show, or happening much slower than we'd like.
Years ago, I was introduced to the idea of the spiral staircase of recovery/healing/change. While it may seem as if we're revisiting many of the same life issues again and again, we're actually on an upward spiral. Each time we come back around to the same issues, we're bringing all that we've learned so far with us. We're not still at the bottom of the staircase, though it may feel and look that way.
Personally, I believe we each have five to ten core lessons to learn in our lifetime. They vary somewhat between individuals, based on what we grew up believing about ourselves and the world. We'll be given similar situations again and again to refine and redefine how we show up, how we see ourselves, and what we believe we deserve.
We will repeat these lessons over and over until we're more often practicing life the way we want it to be. Again, it takes what it takes and for most of us, that means a lifetime of learning and growing. One day we'll realize that we're doing things differently and growth is evident from the inside out.
What would happen to our 2020 outlook if we viewed life as a practice rather than something to master or get right? However you approach your new year and this new decade, remember that you are already awesome. Give yourself grace to practice some more in 2020.
