We found a great home for the kittens and the day slowly approached when we would have to surrender them to their new owners. I found myself wanting to force Gemma and the kittens to spend extra time together those last days. To make every moment count. To nap in a huddle together and play extra hard. Oh, if only I could tell them what was about to happen so they could cherish their last hours together.
It was so difficult to let them go but I trusted new adventures awaited them and that they would be loved well in their new homes. The insights flowed as these four-legged bundles of wisdom illuminated memorable life lessons for each of us to put into practice.
We don’t know what’s about to happen in our lives so we have to make a daily habit to take nothing and no one for granted. We can’t ignore the fact that change happens to us all. People move, careers end, relationships change, loved ones pass—just to name a few of the common transitions we must come to accept as part of life.
What I wouldn’t give to have one more phone call with my baby brother, and I would love to go back in time to play with my son again at the tender age of three. I could list many more examples where I wish I could rewind the clock to soak up just a little bit more of that precious moment which at the time, I didn’t realize I would miss so much.
But here I am now in the present day with a choice. I can continue living my days often running from one thing to the next, with quick hellos and goodbyes to my family and friends as we briefly interact. Am I even fully present in those minimal exchanges? What about the longer periods of time when we are together?
The honest answer is too frequently, no. I’m often more concerned with my to-do list, what didn’t get done today and what needs to happen tomorrow. I preach and teach mindfulness all day. It’s easy to know what to do yet much harder to actually do it. As I write this, my intention is passionately renewed and I’m inspired to practice moment by moment mindfulness even more. After all, mindfulness is a present to both myself and those I spend time with.
Two assignments I’m giving myself and you, if you’re inclined to accept a challenge:
1. Today, catch yourself when you’re drifting away in thought during a beautiful ordinary moment. Bring yourself back and fully be present to whomever you’re with or whatever you’re doing. Really soak it up. Plant the memory in your heart of what’s so special about it so that when ten, twenty or fifty years pass, you can still go back there.
2. This holiday season when gathered with friends and family for celebration, take a moment to look around at every single face and give thanks. I’ve written before about the empty chairs many of us deal with which are even more painful during the holidays. A loved one is no longer with us and their absence is still deeply felt. If you’ve suffered a significant loss, you know what I mean. But we have to make sure we take time to focus on who is here. So take it all in—who is
with you, what makes you laugh, what makes you sad, what do you appreciate and what are you talking about. There is no guarantee any of us will be here for the next holiday so anchor the sights, sounds and love shared so you can go back to it vividly. Memorize the moments.
In summary, we must take nothing for granted but we also can't live in fear of loss. I’ve quoted something like this before, but when we can come to terms with the fact that we all die, we can really start to live.
My wish for you today, this holiday season, in the New year and beyond is presence. Live and love today so that your memories are fuller tomorrow. Minimize your regrets. Soak it all up, this gift of life we are blessed to share.
