On my walk today I saw that Neighbor A has gone on the war path again. He feuds with Neighbor B over dogs and cats, plus Neighbor B’s Bermuda grass creeping into his fescue grass. If you want to read about their past battles, click here. 

This time, Neighbor A has completely dug up the area near the curb that touches Neighbor B’s Bermuda-filled lawn. He has killed multiple spots in his yard, including one really large spot right in front of his porch.

This guy’s yard is frequently a mess in his pursuit of fescue perfection. Meaning, his lawn often looks worse than other people’s, even though they accept their grass covering as “good enough” and he works two to three times as hard. 

By seeking perfection, Neighbor A's yard is brown and under construction a fair amount of the time. It’s regularly worse than those who aren’t seeking perfection from their lawns. Isn’t that ironic?

Ugh, I sure can relate to neighbor A when I consider my own areas of perfectionism. I will muddy things up in the pursuit of perfection and unnecessarily waste a lot of time. I have wrecked paintings that were probably good enough, and maybe even great to someone, by continuing to mess with them and overthink it. One mentor called that, "licking the paint." I have spent hours on a project that I could have finished satisfactorily much earlier and then moved on to something else needing my time and talent. Imperfectly finished is a much better ideal!

The pursuit of perfectionism is usually not made with delight. To the opposite, there’s grinding of teeth, furrowing of brow, and so much tunnel focus that I’m not present or aware of anything else. I don’t take breaks, I ignore hunger and thirst. I’ve checked out and lost any real sense of what else is happening in my surroundings. This is not the state of mindfulness that I want to live in.

Oh, to be content with good enough, that’s definitely one of my ambitions. I am all for seeking excellence and being the best I can be, but usually I know when I have crossed over from excellence into the pursuit of being perfect. (Or, I've invited some other friends over to keep me off track.)

Perfectionism’s good friend is procrastination. To avoid the grueling pursuit of being perfect, we procrastinate. But my procrastination doesn’t look like sitting on the couch watching a movie or taking a nap. I am always working, just not always on the right thing.

I learned a new term last week, procrastivity. I procrastinate one thing by doing another activity, hence the word procrastivity. Cleaning is a very socially acceptable form of procrastivating. Laundry is another good one. Frequently I'm doing a legitimate thing, it’s just not what I said I wanted to accomplish at that particular time. When I keep doing something I don't want to do, I have to ask myself what the payoff is, and what I am afraid of. 

One payoff of trying to be perfect is to hide indecision. I will spend an extra long amount of time on one task to avoid making a decision about what's next or transitioning into the next priority, if I already know what it is. Either way, this is still doing one thing to avoid doing another. And all of this stems from fear of not doing the right thing right enough, or simply being enough as a human.

I’d like to tattoo “good enough” to my wrist to remind myself that I am good enough and that “good enough” will work for most things. My “good enough” is probably someone else’s idea of perfection anyway!

Trying to be perfect is a time waster, and an energy stealer. The good news is that I’m aware of how I operate and I know I want to show up differently. Every day, I build support around how I approach my priorities and intentions to avoid disappearing into these looking-good pitfalls. Accountability is the way through fear and the pursuit of perfection, which too often leads to procrastination and avoidance. We don’t have to stay stuck in behaviors we have outgrown.

When I am committed to a spirit of excellence as I follow my plan for the day, remaining unafraid of the next step, and confident in my ability to discern my next priority, the pursuit of good enough feels a lot better to my spirit.

Time is a gift, and I am ready to steward that resource today in ways that lead to greater peace, adequate productivity, and abundant prosperity (with a definition of prosperity that goes far beyond financial).

Let us not keep our “yards” torn up trying to be perfect. Let us not fall down rabbit holes, where we stay obsessed and checked out from the important things. Let us celebrate being imperfectly finished and move on to the next thing. And let us keep peace with ourselves and our neighbors. I wish you a perfection-free day!
 

By the way, if you struggle in similar ways, you would be a welcome participant in my 22-day program, Micro Magic. This course, offered only once a year, is coming in January, just in time to kickstart new habits for 2024. Micro Magic entails twenty-two days of forward progress, one small step at a time, with compassionate hand-holding from someone who understands the struggle. 

Built to bust through fear and procrastination, and able to fit into the busiest schedule, Micro Magic will mobilize you in the things that matter most.  Check out the full description and past participant reviews here. Then, reply to this email to save your spot. If you're already on the wait list, please reply anyway so I can make sure you're included when registration opens up soon.